Couples fighting the distance – Read their side of the story

(Not so) recently I’ve posted an article about LDR which contained whole concept from my point of view. I wanted to give more people the floor to speak up. I believe we should always listen to more than one point of view because it is what makes us smarter. I used the power of easy connection through Instagram and asked for a short personal summary of the couple and these three questions which were not easy to answer. That way I ensured I wouldn’t get only boring and repetitive answers. But first let’s get to know the couples who were kind enough to provide their answers and unique stories.

1. Hasip & Karina – Turkey and Uruguay: They met 6 years ago online. 12 102 km separates them…not only the distance but also different religions, languages and continents but what unites them is the love they have for each other. They waited 14 months for meeting and they’ve already met 11 times. They are working hard on overcoming the distance soon.

2. Camilla & Fredrik – Brazil and Norway: met on Inner Circle (which Camilla was using because of hang out events they hold in different countries). She was travelling alone to Sweden and Norway and got this app recommended as something better than Tinder. They matched and started talking, then video calling. Overall it’s been 1 year and a month so far. Camilla has been to Norway three times already and Fredrik came to Brazil to see her. She plans to move to Norway if she gets accepted to the masters programme. 2020 will be an exciting year for them!

3. Rebeca & Jordan - USA and Germany: Beca and her fiancé met in 2015 while she was working as an au-pair in Virginia. They have been a couple ever since 2016. They try to see each other every three to four months and hopefully by 2020 they’ll close the distance and live together.

4. Kiana and Emmanuel – USA and France: met online in early 2013, they were almost 5000 miles away from each other but they knew right away they wanted to be together. They spent the first few years of the relationship flying back and forth till Kiana moved and closed the distance in France. Since then they married and settled in the US together.

5. Gordon & Svea – Australia and Germany: They met when Svea took a gap year in Australia and worked in a German restaurant. They’ve been together for 2 years and 5 months in January. They’re planning to close the distance at the end of 2020 after more than 3 years of distance.

6. Maja & Jamin – Poland and Korea: They met in Poland at football match. Neither of them planned it, he was just on a road trip in Europe and Maja went to the match with her friend. They just wanted to take a photo together but now they’ve become a couple!

7. Andy and Tika – Portugal and Indonesia: Met on social media and in real life after 5 months of LDR, now they are doing long distance again and they will meet next year.

8. Kris and Jiung – USA and South Korea: When Kris started at her university, her Korean teacher told her she should speak to native speakers, so she joined a language training app where she found Jiung. They became great friends, then one day he asked to meet in person. Right after the meeting, they fell fast and hard for each other.

First question: Why do you think a LDR are worth it?

‘He is different in the sense that he and I make the same amount of effort to be together and we put the relationship as the first priority. I must tell however that LDR are not for everyone. Ours isn’t perfect because there’s no such thing. It is worth is because he is genuinely the best person I’ve ever met, and he brings out the best of me. I truly believe that when you find that one person you love, there’s no distance that will keep you apart from him/her – and for us, we know that it will be only temporary.’ - @camillacarrapatoso on IG

‘I think it’s worth it because he’s worth it. The love is real and it’s everything I’ve ever wanted. The distance isn’t enough to ruin it.’ - @justkriskrisblog on IG

‘I don’t think all LDR are worth it. You have to find the right person for it to be worth it, someone who is patient and hard-working enough to nurture the relationship despite difficulties that come with long distance. But if you do, I think it’s worth it because it can blossom into a relationship built on a strong foundation of trust and good communication.’ - @_.clever.girl._ on IG

‘Because you get to know each other on a whole new level. The love and trust you gain for one another is not comparable to any other love.’ -@b_eca on IG

‘I think it’s worth it because he’s the one. Nowadays society has forgotten how to fight and believe in love. Love is fast-moving and there are heaps of choices, especially with online dating. It is right fighting for something that feels right instead of giving up and looking for another option.’ - @sveaa_love_ on IG

‘I think LDR is worth it if they have commitment to meet in reality. My boyfriend and I did and now we fight the distance, we have plans for our future and we are in a serious relationship.’ - @tikasitohang13 on IG

Second question: What makes the LDR a success in your eyes?

‘To make it successful you have to trust yourself that you can make it first. You have to face the distance and wait for however long it will take, be patient. And the key is to trust him – trust that he’ll never leave you and learn about him every day. Call each day just to say hi and to see if your partner is fine or not. And pray because God will never stop helping.’ - @tikasitohang13 on IG

‘Communication, commitment and the ability to love without being able to touch are big for the success of an LDR. We still fight like normal couples, but we always focus in talking it out, because we want to make it work. A lot of things can be misconstrued over text or messaging, so it’s really important to be open and listen to what they’re telling you and vice versa.’ - @justkriskrisblog on IG

‘We communicate very well. Openness is the key of success. We feel comfortable to tell each other everything and that sure makes a huge difference in how the relationship goes. I’d rather videocall with my boyfriend on a Friday night than go clubbing. It’s about commitment.’ - @camillacarrapatoso on IG

‘Successful LDR means having the ability to overcome all the obstacles together, value every part of the process. We have to learn from every situation. Being patient and understand that this is part of the relationship, not the whole thing.’ - @hasip.karina on IG

‘Communication is the key! It is most important to communicate continuously. Apart from that it’s important to have goals that you can work towards to. For example, next meeting or closing up the distance.’ - @sveaa_love__on IG

‘For me the success is that we’re the most important to each other, we have dreams about future together and we’re trying to make this come true. For us distance is only a number and a test to see how far away love can travel. And we’re ready to spend all money to travel to each other.’ - @sagi_jamin on IG

Third question: What’s your happiest or saddest moment concerning the relationship?

‘The saddest moments of our relationships were definitely airport goodbyes. It’s hard to choose one moment as our happiest moment since we’ve been so lucky to experience so many amazing things together, but I would say a highlight was our two-week honeymoon trip around Japan.’ - @_.clever.girl._ on IG

‘Happies part is being together, saddest thing being apart in special occasions when you just need a hug.’ - @hasip.karina on IG

‘The happiest moments for me are the first seconds when we have eye contact on the airport, first hug and first kiss after such a long time. It makes me realise that we did it together! I also love our cultural crossing. It’s so funny when our cultures are so different, helps us learn about each other’s cultures. And the saddest? I think it’s the last night before coming back home when both of us are trying to fall asleep but it’s just impossible. And the last eye contact at the airport.’ - @sagi_jamin on IG

‘The cliché happiest moment is obviously whenever you’re with your loved one. Perhaps I can say the happiest moment is going to sleep together knowing we don’t have to say goodbye. It’s heart-warming to just extend your arms and reach your love next to you. The saddest moments are the goodbyes. To me it gets harder and harder every single time. As if my heart is being ripped out of my chest.’ - @camillacarrapatoso on IG

‘The saddest moments are the hours leading up to a goodbye at the airport. The happiest are finally seeing each other, being able to kiss, hug, hold hands and enjoy the presence of the other person.’ -@b_eca on IG

These were the answers I collected over the last few weeks. It shows how both – easy and extremely difficult it can get. There will always be ups and downs, pros and cons about long-distance relationships. It takes extreme commitment, truthfulness, absolute trust, and strong love to make it work. Plus the majority of people would agree the most important thing is to have a common goal in the future and creating small milestone goals like meeting in the near future. Obviously, LDR is not for everybody, and to those who are in one – I wish you all the love and luck so you can make it to the finish line!